Words of the Day for July 2026
People leave us lovely words in the amusingly named dick, along with short, factual and concise definitions. No really. Here's this month's words so far...
Saturday July 4th, 2026
oldmancollecting
Origins from ‘Fist of Fun’ (BBC) – one of the Hobbies.
For this hobby you will require: a packet of bourbon biscuits, a lockable room and a flask of weeeek lemon drink.
Go out on pension day and attempt to woo old men into your locakble room using bourbon biscuits – “Would you like a bourbon old man? Answer me!”. Hold out biscuit to old man. walk backwards with biscuit in constant focus of old man. When arriving home, throw biscuit into locakbale room and old man will follow. Shut door and lock it. Repeat.
Or something like that
Friday July 3rd, 2026
List
Mark Thomas Mailing List aka The List aka the Gay Cabal
Thursday July 2nd, 2026
Kate
Character in ‘Eastenders’ who inexplicably gave up her job as an undercover police officer in order to open up a nail bar. Quite what skills the two proffessions share, or why anyone would consider it a logical career step, has never been satifactorily explained.
Thursday July 2nd, 2026
Virtual Friends
People you speak to online but have never met in real life
Thursday July 2nd, 2026
LOL
Lots of Love, Lots of Laughs.
Cock in Punjabi
LOL Williams, musician from Essex
Thursday July 2nd, 2026
boring farts
Boring Fart – The effort of breaking wind with great physical exertion without any clear result. Often noiseless and odourless they are pointless and should never be owned up to. See Interesting Fart
Thursday July 2nd, 2026
dyke
go to holland put your finger in one and she if she bites back!
Thursday July 2nd, 2026
defenestration
I knew what this was but haven’t read a book by whoever or done any academical stuff. I’m just clever, so ner.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Poverty wank
Wank you have when you don’t even feel like having a tug, you haven’t got time and its going to make you late, you’re not even properly erect, you barely orgasm and you’re mopping up before your dust has barely settled,... but you do it anyway.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
FILTH AND DEPRAVITY
It’s what’s wrong with Britain. Too much filth and depravity.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
sickipedia
Sick jokes compendium from the people that brought you b3ta
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Graham
A sort of cracker eaten by Americans. They have no idea it might be someones name.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Cakes
In a bowl, cream together 4oz/125g caster sugar and 4oz/125g butter
Break two eggs into a glass or jug, and beat together with a fork. Add the egg to the butter and sugar a bit at a time, stirring it in thoroughly each time
When all the egg is mixed in, sieve 4oz/125g self-raising flour into the mix, and stir in thoroughly
Spoon the bixture into cake cases, and bake in a pre-heated oven at 190C/375F/Gas Mark 5 for ten to fifteen minutes, until they’re golden brown
Then try lots of variations, like adding 2oz of sultanas, or glace cherries, or cocoonut. Try adding spices, or replace a quarter of the flour with cocoa powder. And experiment with icing!
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Homophobia
A name originally proposed for a third rate British newspaper.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Interweb
The broken definition of “Internet” the
“Interweb”. Used by those members of the media and people who think that the web is the Internet. (There are other protocols too, you know...)
And probably your parents.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
fucktard
Someone who isn’t blessed with the clever clogs and is frequently battered with the stupid stick
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
gwrywgydiwr Budr
dirty homosexual.....what i am and what i like,amongst other things.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Eamonn Holmes
Known for keeping the donut makers of the UK in business.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
randomness
Chaotic, disorganised, with no discernable order
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
KA
Short for “Kings Arms” a delightful little pub filled with short, badly dressed bearded trolls. Does karaoke on Sundays which is far more entertaining than say doing the average washing.
Plus point: Only gay bar in London to sell proper beer.
Negative point: Scary 
Once tried to divert a Freakcity picnic there. And failed. Those that remained wouldn’t go in. Wusses. (and yes, that means *you*, kee)
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch
A good 1000-1 chance of typing this word if you have a fit on the keyboard after seeing too much debauchery
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
hornover
The frustrating condition that occurs when you’re so hungover and randy you can’t think of anything other than sex, but unfortunately are unable to stand up for long enough to have any.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
the wall
An album by Pink_Floyd – sold in excess of 23 million copies. Released in 1979, favourite of Scott’s mum so he ended up brought up on it. Third best selling album of all time in the US – topped only by Michael_Jackson’s Thriller and The_Eagles – Greatest Hits. Scott once got an A- in English for writing about it.
Very depressing, introspective and dark.
Turned into a film by Alan_Parker, sort of explains what the album’s about.
Also spawned some amazingly gorgeous artwork by Gerald_Scarfe
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
retro
A way of admitting new stuff is shit, by rebuilding the old stuff again...
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
C*nt
A word used by people who don’t like using the word Cunt, and think putting a little star in place of the U makes it slightly less offensive.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Frooming
Slowly splaying your fingers across someone’s knee. On some people, this has no effect what so ever, but some people just melt when you do it to them.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Q
Died in a car crash on a roundabout I used to go round every day on my way to and from work.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
self-worship
The worship of oneself as a god....its what us pretty ones do
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
golfing umbrellas
Unless you’re on a golf-course, this is just the most irritating US-esque “bigger is beautiful” invention ever created.....even cars don’t get my goat as much as these bloody things do.
How many people do you normally see under them? and how large are their heads?
Just too fucking big.
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
canal street
In Manchester
Centre of Gay Village
See also Anal Treet
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Stoner
someone who tries to solve unaceptably obscure puzzles
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
flowers poofy stuff like that
All the thing Men aint sposed to like
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
vodka
When you can taste it, you know you’ve had too much of it
Wednesday July 1st, 2026
Ramsey, Gordon
Very annoying man who needs a good punching