Words of the Day for June 2026
People leave us lovely words in the amusingly named dick, along with short, factual and concise definitions. No really. Here's this month's words so far...
Friday June 26th, 2026
Duckie
Fabulous club night that’s been running for 800 years. Can’t really describe it’s greatness, see link below:
Friday June 26th, 2026
faceherpes
unlike the more common Oral & Genital herpes which are common and hard to see, FaceHerpes sufferers are usually brutally disfigured by the condition causing thousands of people around the world to become PAINFULLY UGLY to the point where most people are unable to look directly at them.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Kermits Mouth
Slang for the shallow hinged flap of scrotum offcuts and nerve endings surgeons fashion into a vagina facsimile in male to female transsexuals. Sex with such an organ is said to be akin to pushing your foot into a shoe whose toe has been stuffed with paper.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Assam
Assam is a black tea named after the region of its production (Assam, India). This tea grown at sealevel is known for its body, briskness, malty flavor, and strong, bright color. Historically, Assam is the second commercial tea production region after China. China and Assam are the only two regions in the world with native tea plants. Assam tea revolutionized tea drinking habits since the tea, produced from a different variety of the tea plant, yielded a different kind of tea.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Gaydar
Supposedly what all gay men are equipped with to “spot” their own kind. Well mine must have been left out when I was assembled cos I’m fucked if I can spot one...
Friday June 26th, 2026
toast
Toast is sliced bread that has been browned by high, radiant heat until it becomes crisp and golden, mainly through the Maillard reaction that changes its flavor and texture.
### What toast is
• Toast is simply a slice of bread heated until its surface turns golden brown and firmer.
• The browning is caused by the Maillard reaction, which develops a deeper flavor and aroma.
• The firmer surface makes it easier to spread things like butter or jam, and the warmth helps spreads melt slightly.
### Basic definition
• Dictionaries define toast as sliced bread made crisp and brown by heat, usually browned on both sides.
• The word can also mean dishes built on toasted bread, such as avocado toast or cheese toast.
### How to make toast (simple)
• Put sliced bread in a toaster, choose a medium setting, and heat until browned to your liking.
• Carefully remove the hot toast and add toppings such as butter or jam while it is still warm.
### Making toast in the oven
• For oven toast, place bread slices directly on the rack or a tray in a single layer.
• Bake at around 425 °F (about 220 °C) for roughly 10–18 minutes, or broil 1–2 minutes per side, adjusting time for thickness and desired darkness.
Common toast toppings
• Classic toppings include butter, jam, nut butters, cheese, and avocado.
• You can add fruits (banana, berries, figs), vegetables (tomatoes, cucumbers, leafy greens), and extras like seeds, nuts, honey, or spices.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Freakcity
This website. Born from the frustration of another website implementing strange rules a few years back Scott and a couple of others decided we could probably make our own. So we did. We try and make it have the same general feel as IRC but with prettier pictures and no netsplits.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Woolworths
Good for toy shopping when it’s a neice/nephew/cousin/whoever’s birthday.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Shaking coconuts off of the veiny love tree
Euphamism for Tidying my room
Friday June 26th, 2026
online fora
Alternative plural (to online forums) of online forum. Sorry.
Friday June 26th, 2026
Old People
Die when subject to frightening circumstances like sirens and laughter
Thursday June 25th, 2026
dimlow
Something immensely stupid people call those that they perceive to be of a lower intelligence than themselves
Thursday June 25th, 2026
anoraknophobia
Irrational (or otherwise) fear of Anoraks
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Curve321
I like that this is next to Cuntsticks in the dictionary.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Alec R. Costandinos
Alec R. Costandinos’ recording career may have been short-lived, but the Euro-disco producer dominated the disco world during his late-’70s reign. After having made
a name for himself after co-writing Cerrone’s “Love in C Minor” in 1977, Costandinos signed to the French label Barclay where he released his first record as Love and Kisses. This self-titled 1977 LP featured the timeless disco hit “I’ve Found Love (Now That I’ve Found You).” Soon he was releasing hit records on America’s most recognized disco label, Casablanca. Perhaps more importantly, though, he introduced the concept album to dancefloor music with his well-regarded Romeo & Juliet album in 1977, followed by a number of other less successful conceptual efforts. He became best known for “I’ve Found Love,” "Romeo and Juliet," and “Thank God It’s Friday” (the theme song to the movie of the same name), but literally disappeared after a prolific 1977 to 1979 run.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
cobaconfee
The only word Scott can manage before breakfast.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
colouring in
Common reference used to describe any educational course after Year 9 in Geography
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
interstitial pages
pages that are interstitial
see interstitial
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Computer Games
They also Cost you a fortune in Hardware Upgrades [PC] for playing the New games that are always comeing out that Demand Better Hardware
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Doctor Who
Sci-fi show that is mysteriously popular amongst men in their 30s and 40s, especially gay ones (straight ones usually watch for the assistant instead).
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
controversy
What happens when your friends/family/coworkers act like they’re in an episode of Hollyoaks and everybody gets too moody about everything.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
scottaging
An overnight stay at scott’s house.
May include boozing, Swan, XXL, Kazzo, TJ porn, and trying not to wake everyone up with scott’s creaky bed.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Tuatha de Danon
Tribes of the Earth Goddess Dan(u|a)
There were 4 tribes I think and they certainly had 4 treasures.
1. Dagda’s Cauldron, which fed all who came to eat from it.
2. the Spear of Lugh which was so bloodthirsty it had to be kept in a cauldron of poppies.
3. the Stone of Fal which cried out when the true Ard Ri (high King) stood upon it.
4. the Sword of Nuada which could cut through anything.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Forbidden Planet
Exceptionally cool but rather geeky SciFi/Fantasy store in London
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
Gooch
The sensitive bit between your hole and your genuine Italy (or the “gen Italia” as they say).
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
alcohol
Can be used as a direct replacement for blood in case i have an accident.
Wednesday June 24th, 2026
old man collecting
A Hobby.
For this hobby you will need:
a lockable cupboard or room
a packet of bourbon biscuits and some weak lemon drink 
Tuesday June 23rd, 2026
wendy
Fat bitch with ginger pigtails who makes Obese burgers in America
Tuesday June 23rd, 2026
trains
invested by the British... perfected by the French and Japanese....
Even India and Mali Railways look good compared to ours.
Monday June 22nd, 2026
Spod
To use a computer – especially the internet – for any purpose that’s not specifically constructive or "useful"
Monday June 22nd, 2026
Macromedia Flash
A tool for designing animations, web layouts, images, and interactive interfaces
Monday June 22nd, 2026
Swanning
What happens to Scott on a Friday night after too much beer. Usually happens when Gaz turns up and spends much of the evening saying “Swan?” with Scott replying “no”. Gaz will buy Scott a drink and then ask again, until the answer becomes “yes”.
Monday June 22nd, 2026
life
Life is a series of keeping things to yourself.
Monday June 22nd, 2026
prophylaxis
Preventing exposure to nasty diseases by spending most of the night editing your profile instead of partying.
Monday June 22nd, 2026
Dope
A far more enjoyable alternative to alcohol. Symptoms (in me, at least) include mellowness, giggliness and feelieness (qv)
Monday June 22nd, 2026
B3ta loop
When you visit www.b3ta.com at lunch for a quick browse of the latest stuff and then suddenly it’s 5:30 and you don’t know where the afternoon went
Sunday June 21st, 2026
Gaydar
Community orientated website aimed at bringing people together through events (usually sexual) find mates through linked keywords such as SCAT and cocksize=LARGE. Please do not mention you are looking for a boyfriend because that means you are a potential psycho. Do tell everyone you are happy with you boyfriend and then spend all day logged onto gaydar trying to find your next one.
Sunday June 21st, 2026
Fat Guys
Amazingly goregeous people to certain breeds of gays, who deserve every bit of attention they get. Usually ridiculed by the population at large, spend their time doing fat guy things like smoking a lot, being depressed, starting a family, etc...
– Warning, may be over/under sensitive to thinner people
Sunday June 21st, 2026
Random stuff
THis would involve such acts as running down the road with a traffic cone on your head.
This is not to be confused with drunken behaviour.
Sunday June 21st, 2026
absinthe
Three bored prostitutes in Paris.. Get really really pissed on Absinthe.. They pass out and wake up next day to see hundreds of motorbikes in the garden..
One says “Oh God ..what did we do last night??” Another replies.. "Oh dont worry.. didnt you know that... Absinthe makes the tarts grow Hondas..."
Sunday June 21st, 2026
Morrissey
Stephen Patrick Morrissey. Rather a good singer/lyricist
Sunday June 21st, 2026
shes0nfire
Now known as NormanFreeman.
Name taken from a Train song.
Sunday June 21st, 2026
singing in the car
Get funny looks from other road users, sometimes they join in.
Sunday June 21st, 2026
SPACED
One of the best places to steal all of your witty one liners from.
e.g. ‘Woah there pickle’
Sunday June 21st, 2026
Milton Keynes
Vacuous void of a town (yes...not a city...a town) somewhere around Junction 13/14 on the M1. Famous for concrete cows, pioneering street design and a vast shopping centre – a place unnervingly efficent and practical. Apparently people live here.....I’ve never seen the houses there so they must live in the ground like trolls. Home to the once great, yet sadly maligned Wimbledon FC (R.I.P.)
Sunday June 21st, 2026
I so ain’t declaring anything here
Well you didn’t think there’d be any further information by clicking on that link, did you?
Sunday June 21st, 2026
bumhikan
One of the more amusing side effects of using hair gel as lube
Sunday June 21st, 2026
chocolate teapot
Noun. A useless thing. Usually heard in phrases such as “as useful as a chocolate teapot.” E.g. "A car without wheels is as useful as a chocolate teapot."
Sunday June 21st, 2026
looking at computer screens
something which often gets in the way of being, or doing though not to be confused with thinking
Sunday June 21st, 2026
iPod
A walkman that looks like a pillbox with built in DRM and a battery that can’t be changed without breaking and entering. Which if was launched by Microsoft rather than Apple would have been flamed more than a troll in newsgroup hell.
Saturday June 20th, 2026
Nuggetry
The problem with one track minds is they always lead to nuggetry
Saturday June 20th, 2026
Pished
Adj. Drunk, intoxicated. See ‘pissed’.
That marvelous state you enter after 8 or more drinks. When even the ugliest people start to be come attractive and speech becomes a slurred flurry of obscene misspronunciations (try saying that pished) and gratuitous joining and merging of terms. See also Goin’slash, who’ons’a’rink etc.
Saturday June 20th, 2026
netsplits
Putting your foot through the wrong hole in your tights
Saturday June 20th, 2026
Football
(Noun) – a game for lads who are too camp for rugby
Saturday June 20th, 2026
Pink Floyd
British band, Got together in the 60s after meeting at Cambridge. Spent all their grant money on musical equipment. Made a name for themselves because of their psychadelic shows, these were twinned with cutting edge light shows and the like. Made it big during the 70s. Sold more albums worldwide than any other band ever anywhere. The Dark Side of the Moon was in the American Album Chart top 100 for 2 weeks short of 14 years. They mostly managed this without writing crappy love songs either
Scott’s favourite band ever 
Scott’s brother went out with David_Gilmour’s daughter.
The band once played in the living room of Scott’s first boyfriend’s parents in the 60s when they weren’t very good.
Saturday June 20th, 2026
Donkey Punch
When doing someone in the bottom, simply punch them in the back of the neck upon ejaculation, while shouting something exclamative. Who’s on bottom THIS week, honey?
Saturday June 20th, 2026
swan
White bird with long neck. You get in trouble with the Queen if you kill one apparently. And if you feed them bread in the park, they are the most violent of the lot. Honest.
Saturday June 20th, 2026
Faggots
The little bits of kindling used in burning witches and unnatural beings (gays) in the middle ages. Over time, the word was confused to mean the victims of the burning, rather than the wood. Today, we’re ALL BIG FAGGOTS!
Friday June 19th, 2026
tlentifini maarhaysu
Fictional TV series referred to obliquely in BBC’s spoof 1970s science program Look Around You.
’.’)=
Friday June 19th, 2026
pink pound
I thought it was a dumping ground for unwanted cars due to the colour of their paintwork
Friday June 19th, 2026
puddings
Also good for sex, and still teast good after too
Friday June 19th, 2026
theavengers
Unless we’re Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman, in which case we’re residing at the bottom of the bargain bin in Woolworths for £2.99
Friday June 19th, 2026
45
%age of “girls” on cam4 who are actually guys trying to see some straight dicks
Friday June 19th, 2026
FSP
Abbreviation of: Fictional Silver Plane. Occasional tool of music video directors to shows the artiste on a futuristic silver aeroplane. Jeniifer Lopez taunted the DJ on one in her song ‘Play’ and more recently Britney Spears was a toxic stewardess on another
Friday June 19th, 2026
Metro
I had one.......It died after I signed the execution document.........well it was a Scrap Amnesty after all.....who could blame me?
Friday June 19th, 2026
northampton
Is so South-East Midlands. Not east enough to be Angularn...
Friday June 19th, 2026
the wall
The popular name for the “pain-barrier”
eg I went through the wall listening to 3 Spice Girls songs on Friday
Friday June 19th, 2026
spiders
q.v. “Aragog” in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and “Shelob” in LOTR.
Friday June 19th, 2026
furtling
The act of cutting holes in a photograph and popping your knuckles through them to give the appearance of breasts
Thursday June 18th, 2026
google
Apparently my uni recomends we use this search engine if we are going to be using the internet for historical research. It’s the best...apparently.
Thursday June 18th, 2026
politician
If one shakes your hand, count your fingers afterwards. If their lips move they are lying.
Thursday June 18th, 2026
post-punk
period following punk;
see ‘the fall’, ‘joy division’
Thursday June 18th, 2026
Milton Keynes
Godforsaken place that has no relevance to the existance of human life, except for the fact it is there. No one likes it, but people actually live there. Now you know hwere the Bogeyman comes from.
Thursday June 18th, 2026
crash
Verb. 1. To share, loan or borrow. E.g."That’s the third cigarette you’ve crashed off me in the last hour!"
2. To temporarily stay over or sleep at a place other than at one’s own usual abode. E.g."Can I crash at yours tonight? It’ll cost too much for a taxi home."
Noun. The situation of crashing (See ‘crash’ verb). E.g."Come on, get your cigarettes out, it’s your crash."
Thursday June 18th, 2026
traveling
Americanism for travelling – usually involves a car of some description and some burgers
Thursday June 18th, 2026
Oxford
My second home and future place of residence. Isn’t friendly to drivers but a great place to live. Lovely people. Fantastic shops. Beautiful buildings.
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
Syd Barrett
Original lead singer/songwriter for Pink_Floyd – Allegedly “Shine on you Crazy Diamond” was written about him as he went a bit loopy on drugs.
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
404
term to describe a non-brain-activated action or person. ie. ’she’s a total 404’ (comes from the 404 error message when a web-page can’t be found)
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
ITV
Lowest common denominator telly, designed for chav scum who haven’t found channels other than this, BBC1 and Sky One on their remotes – rarely challenging, often patronising and frequently boring. Their saving grace? Bad Girls and Footballers Wives...
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
MySpace Suicide
Leaving MySpace in a strop of “you’re all bastards/nobody understands me/I’ve taken 15,000 aspirin and I’m going now” only to return about 5 days later under a different name whilst looking a little sheepish
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
spiders
Arachnids. The hairy ones are usually quite cute
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
jaffa cakes
Giles is willing to forgive looting for them, so they must be good.
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
crap
Noun. 1. Nonsense, rubbish, something useless or not good.
2. An act of defecation.
3. Faeces.
Exclam. An exclamation of disbelief, annoyance.
Verb. To defecate. Defecate is infact a euphemism meaning to purify or cleanse. E.g."He crapped behind a tree and wiped his arse (anus) with a huge leaf."
Adj. Rubbishy, of no worth.
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
hearse
A dodgy pub in the East End of London known as the Black Horse, affectionately called the “Bleak Hearse” by its regulars – tends to be frequented by a strange mix of essex gayers and ladyboys as well as hundreds of faghags and the odd lesbian. Can be quite a laugh at times
Plus they have a pool table. Yay!
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
Wine
Alcoholic beverage made from grapes, parsnips, dandelions, pretty much anything fruity or vegetable-like.
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
biscuits
Great with chocolate.
Custard cremes aren’t that bad. Jaffa cakes are horrid.
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
Orpington
Too dull to be London... but disowned by Kent
Wednesday June 17th, 2026
blithbury
A look someone gives you by which you become aware that they’re much too drunk to have understood anything you’ve said to them in the last twenty minutes.
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
Jumble Sales
Jumbles Sales are the perfect place to meet older ‘Fag Hags’ normally in the form of little old ladies working for the local WI.
A great place to pick up things to then sell on eBay.
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
freak
Freak. A person who is envied because they are a fabulously unique individual that can kick ass and that has no need or desire to follow the flock
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
Snow
Anyone thought about being naked in the snow.... cold but so hot!
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
pub crawl
Utterly pointless exercise which involves getting up from one pub where you have a seat and walking through some godforsaken town-centre street to a pub where you have not a snowflake in hell’s chance of getting a seat. Repeated ad nauseam until closing time.
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
McMammoth
the ultimate in obese constipatory food products from a leading American family restaurant chain
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
French and Saunders
They appear live during brilliant concerts dressed as Santa and bully the backing singers! Oh yes!
Tuesday June 16th, 2026
computers
Things that go “bleep” in SciFi movies. Usually have two huge and pointless tape spools on the top...
Monday June 15th, 2026
swan
Gay bar in East London, famous for its amateur strip night every Wednesday – tends to be a haunt of Scott’s as it’s 5 mins walk from his flat. Not a bad place, mixed crowd of young and old
Monday June 15th, 2026
Milton Keynes
“Wouldn’t be nice if all cities where like Milton Keynes”.. *grab Red Balloon"
Monday June 15th, 2026
vodka
A lovely drink containing alcohol that gets you very pished
Monday June 15th, 2026
Scart to Scart
Analogue TV detective show with a male to female lead
*groan*
Monday June 15th, 2026
404
An unlucky number in China since it sounds like “Si” the Chinese for death. Never drive a car with 4 in the numberplate.
Monday June 15th, 2026
Archery
Really quite good fun, and a useful stopgap before you realise that saying you’ll go cycling means school will trust you to leave the campus on a Wednesday afternoon and cycle around South Dartmoor, whereas you actually sit in a field and get stoned lots.
Hypothetically, of course.
Monday June 15th, 2026
Zoom
Zoom – just one look and then my heart went boom
Suddenly and we were on the moon
Monday June 15th, 2026
camp queens
someone to throw out of bed on a sunday morning!
Monday June 15th, 2026
Oyster card
A strange blue card that doesn’t taste like Oyster at all, and makes bus fares on some Red buses 80p but doesn’t work on Green, Blue & Yellow or the white swoopy ones.. Confused of Surrey :s
Monday June 15th, 2026
Canonization
The act of being fired out of the pope’s cannon of love.
Monday June 15th, 2026
browns
The result of cloning Gordon Brown*
*Warning: excessive prudence may be injurious to the economy.
Monday June 15th, 2026
Lamb
Nice choon from John Taverner, as featured in Orange Photo Messaging adverts.
Monday June 15th, 2026
UPS
Uninterruptable Power Supply. Big thing with a battery. It plugs into the mains, you plug computers into it. If the power goes out because your flatmate’s 50kw dildo causes a freak surge tripping all your circuit breakers, the UPS kicks in and powers your computer for about 10 mins or so, which is enough time to either have the power back on or for the UPS to tell the computer to shut down quietly
Monday June 15th, 2026
Pathos
One of the three modes of persuasion in rhetoric. Pathos appeals to the audience’s emotions.
NOT one of the three musketeers
Monday June 15th, 2026
aconite
The dried poisonous root of various herbs of the genus Aconitum containing aconitine, used externally as an analgesic.
Saturday June 13th, 2026
yack up
Verb. To vomit. E.g."That was the worst meal ever; I feel like yacking up."
Saturday June 13th, 2026
BNP
The British National Party.
A bunch of racist idiots, led by some clever racists.
Have somehow weedled their way into serious British Politics, mainly relying on opportunism.
Saturday June 13th, 2026
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
Longer than Antidisestablishmentarianism, a disease of the lungs caused by dust.
Saturday June 13th, 2026
bulge
A phenomenon that happens to people’s stomachs after the festive season
Saturday June 13th, 2026
Orpington
This is London Bridge... this is London Bridge, the train standing at platform 3 is the delayed one ten service to Orpington, calling at some dull places. Please note this train is “fast” to Hither Green.
Saturday June 13th, 2026
Dilbert
Cartoon about a dog and cat who want to take over the universe and their hapless owner, Dilbert
Saturday June 13th, 2026
Willow
A rather bad 1988 film directed by Ron Howard which contracted practically every dwarf in the country as an extra.
Saturday June 13th, 2026
Hokey-Pokey
Also a stupidly annoying playground song which must be banished to the darkest depths of history
Friday June 12th, 2026
BombSaph
Bombay Saphire. Another gin I can drink. Bluish in colour, or is that the bottle. Different oodjits in it. Second choice of gins, after tanqueray
Friday June 12th, 2026
zombies
Like monsters, only even more scary. They are undead muthafuckas who want to eat your brain!
Thursday June 11th, 2026
Nutmeg
Great (or grate) on home-made rice pudding......yummy!
Thursday June 11th, 2026
east Dulwich
Increasingly (as of 2006) trendy corner of south-east London, inhabited by those in the know. Allegedly inhabited by those who can’t afford Clapham.
See Peckham.
Thursday June 11th, 2026
closet
Noun. The condition where one’s homosexuality is concealed. ‘Coming out of the closet’ implying living true to one’s sexuality.
Thursday June 11th, 2026
Dishonesty
See also Blair lies lies its all lies....there is a Swansea
Thursday June 11th, 2026
novak
Scott’s server. Shiny silver thing that runs his 42" plasma screen. Also ½ of irc.freakcity.net.
Named after Gwen Novak, one of the aliases of Hazel Stone, a member of the Families and one of the people who freed luna
Thursday June 11th, 2026
Freaks
The users of this website. We’re a sociable bunch and quite lovely 
Thursday June 11th, 2026
Social networking
The latest thing on the internet. Freakcity could be seen as a “social networking” site. It’s all a bit silleh if you ask me
Thursday June 11th, 2026
remy
A marvelous champagne cognac. Comes in variety of qualities: normal, V.S.O.P (old pale), X.O and Louis XIII for the well off. Also tends to make people less sober.
Thursday June 11th, 2026
John Woo
Film Director, mainly of action films.
Also:
Rhyming slang for poo e.g. “that John Woo I did this morning had a bit of blood in it”
Thursday June 11th, 2026
scott
The epitome of sexual perfection, and my bride-to-be.
Thursday June 11th, 2026
dagenham
Adj. Totally insane, crazy. Because on the London underground/rail transport system Dagenham (Heathway) station is 3 stops beyond Barking station. Barking is slang for crazy. See ‘barking’.
Wednesday June 10th, 2026
Nutmeg
warm, aromatic spice used in a large number of Chrismas dishes and drinks, and available for sprinkling on beverages at Starbucks.
Wednesday June 10th, 2026
gardening
Keeps old people alive longer – almost as good as gene-splicing and NHS treatment
Wednesday June 10th, 2026
alcohol
popular drug treasured for its ability to make the imbiber gracefully acorabatic, hugely witty, astonishingly attractive, and breathtakingly wise.
Excessive alcohol consumption can lead to addiction, poverty and, most worryingly, G-A-Y.
Wednesday June 10th, 2026
Clue
Half an hour of damn funny radio. And Tim Brooke-Taylor
Wednesday June 10th, 2026
Waitrose
A Grocery store that refuses to be called a Supermarket. The Co-Op of the prententious Middle Classes. – like the Co-Op but 4 times the price.
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
TfW
That Fucking Website. AKA OUT. Orangeness, IIS and SQL. With thumbs
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Ben Cohen
The Sexiest Rugby Player known to mankind. Something to snuggle up to in cold winter nights. Sex on legs. Men want him, women want him too...
Observe...
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Tea
A mild concoction, usually made from the “Tea” plant (Thea Veridis), but can be made from many other plants and fruits.
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Heathcunt
Name of made for TV musical starring Cliff Richard following slight alteration to the genuine billboard advert by unknown Croydon graffito artist.
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Fox
Small furry thing that some people like to send dogs after to kill
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Malibu
It just takes one night of drunken fun with this to make you never wanna drink it again. Try thinking about it’s taste the morning after...
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Earl
Aristo type who would have been called a Count (like in the rest of Europe), except the Normans were worried about a disturbingly-similar but strangely-less-flattering Saxon word.
Tuesday June 9th, 2026
Gerald Scarfe
A man married to Jane Asher, queen of “Crossroads Motel” and baking fairy cakes.
Monday June 8th, 2026
defenestration
Murdering someone by pushing them out fo a window. Nine out of ten people who know what this word means have read a book by David Eddings
Monday June 8th, 2026
D&D
Enter a universe where women have beards and muscular men go on killing sprees all in search of one sought-after ring. Hmmm...sounds a bit like Freakcity actually. 
"Those goblins don’t stand a CHANCE against my Fallen Paladin equipped with Codpiece of Destiny +5!! Suck my THAC0!
Monday June 8th, 2026
Heinlein
Robert Anton Heinlein was one of Science Fiction’s grand masters. He wrote, amongst other things, Starship Troopers (although it bears very little in common with the film) and The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress, which is currently being developed for television by Tim Minear. Fanfuckingtastic work. My favourite being “The Cat Who Walks Through Walls”, but his most famous probably being “Stranger in a Strange Land”. Which gave birth to the concept of Grok
Monday June 8th, 2026
spending time down under
This must be a euphamism but for what?
Monday June 8th, 2026
Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
My mate made me buy 2 jugs of this stuff then didn’t drink any of it as she was too pissed. Cheeky bitch.
Monday June 8th, 2026
Midlands
that bit in the middle where Crossroads (all versions) was film
Monday June 8th, 2026
gays, filthy
""Homosexuals can’t swim, they attract enemy radar, they attract sharks, they nudge people when they’re trying to shoot, they always insist on sitting at “The Captain’s Table”... they *muck about*. Imagine... the fear... when you go to sleep with a gay man on board and think “Oh God, when I wake up, will everyone be dead?” You can’t run a ship like that.""
Monday June 8th, 2026
swaray
How stupid people spell “soiree”.
“You are not invited to this soiree because you are a moron for spelling it ’swaray’”.
Monday June 8th, 2026
breathing
The fine art of respiration. Which many people can do :0) Its a great social activity and fun for all the familly. although many a time people are sure to ask that the mother-in-law would just stop doing it.
Breathing is also a particularly bad habit that many 12-26 year old blonde women from essex seem to have picked up. If only there was a slightly less dramatic way of ending their miserable existance then to watch the mass sucide as you tell the westlife have split up or applying arsnic to all gold hoop earings imported to the UK.
Sunday June 7th, 2026
quite
Has two almost opposite meanings. (a) “mildly” as in “I’m quite impressed by Robbie Williams” (b) “extremely” as in “I’m quite infuriated by Robbie Williams”. Take your pick, but do be careful.
Sunday June 7th, 2026
Donnie Darko
Sends me drooling over Jake Gyllenhaal (but lose the chest hair), and going WTF at the ideas explored. Overall – loved it – loads. And yes, I’m a gayer 8-)
Sunday June 7th, 2026
bulge
Battle which took place in Ardennes in the winter of 1944/1945.
Sunday June 7th, 2026
Ben Cohen
.. his brother can be found loitering in my place of work once or twice every year
Sunday June 7th, 2026
Red Dragon
Very nice and stong stout. Also known to get scareglow’s drunk.
Saturday June 6th, 2026
Dwarf
(myth) Short, stubby, tough as nails mythical men who lived in dark caves. Usually mining and melding metals. Known for their thick beards, hatred of elves, and for being totally badass.
Not to be confused with Show White’s dwarfs. They are pansys. real dwarfs are like ninjas. only shorter. and stuff.
Friday June 5th, 2026
Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
Splash a puddle of Angostura bitters into a saucer and place the sugar cube in it to soak. This will take a minute ot two. Stir the Champagne (or sparkling wine), the Vodka and the Blue Curacao together in a container and put into the fridge to chill. Place the soaked sugar cube in the bottom of the Champagne glass, pour in the mixture and add drop in the cocktail onion, which should be loose, not on a cocktail stick
Friday June 5th, 2026
404
Proving that you have failed at websearching, and at life as a whole.
Friday June 5th, 2026
Places the inhabitants of which give her majesty pleasure.
Friday June 5th, 2026
hugging
Like a cuddle,only less intimate, and leading to less sex
Friday June 5th, 2026
ASBO
In the Chav religion, this is somewhat equivalent to “Jihad”. Context: “Oy m8, stop that fukkin round or ill get an asbo on ya”. Usually should be placed squarely on the shoulders of the one shouting it. Some chavs like to collect ASBOs and will attempt to get in trouble just so they can have more.
Friday June 5th, 2026
cycling
Tell that to this man!
Not to mention that cycling up hills gives you really toned arse!
Thursday June 4th, 2026
Food
Yummy scrumptiousness...like coconut macaroons....or anything pastry-infested
Thursday June 4th, 2026
ecstasy
I have been know to enter said state of extreme happiness after winning £4.75 on a bet on the Martell Grand National in 1998
Thursday June 4th, 2026
monsters
"My mommy always said there were no monsters – no real ones – but there are."
Thursday June 4th, 2026
Pretty men
[n. pl.] A particular genus of human noted for their aesthetically pleasing arrangement of facial features and/or hairstyle. Most tend to look good half dressed and photographed in black and white. May or may not have more than two GCSEs.
Thursday June 4th, 2026
wanking
*giggle*. Well you all know what that means, <i>surely</i>?
Thursday June 4th, 2026
Mobile Phone
device for the downloading of porn off the WAP (WAP: WIRELESS ADULT PHONE)
Thursday June 4th, 2026
tuppence
/Tuppence, Tuppence?/
The term (formerly) used to detail 2 pence.
Immortalized in the film ‘Mary Poppins’.
Thursday June 4th, 2026
cynds
apparently a native child who know nothing and lack manners?
make anysense to you?
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
Co-Op Out
To veg out on chocolate, crisps and other junk/convenience food from your local corner store.
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
skinheads
Gay men with shaved heads who often wear agressive and intimidating clothing. Get their kicks consensually beating the shit out of anyone they percieve as attractive. Not to be confused with [1].
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
Douglas Coupland
Author of Generation X, which has a loud pink cover which messes with your eyes. It’s also a very good book with no real ending, just a long string of modern parables.
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
controversy
Contra – Against
Versus – The line (of writing)
Not to take the established line but rather to see an alternative, a sign of intelligence.
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
chicken
Noun. 1. A young person. Very common on the gay scene for an attractive young male.
2. A game of courage in which competitors dare one another to complete a given task. Usually a game of adolescence.
Adj. Cowardly. {Informal}
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
Daily Mail
election Flyer for the BNP..
not fit to wipe your arse on
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
scone
A savoury cake, nice piping hot with butter or (I’ve discovered recently) cold with jam and clotted cream. The correct pronuciation of the word “scone” is one of the most controversial and hotly debated subjects in the history of creation.
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
G-A-Y
Hellish dinge pit in central London playing utter trash
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
name value pairs
High profile couples much sort after at socialite dinner parties, as in "Felicity, can we invite both Charles & Camilla and Madonna & Guy? They’re both such great name value pairs."
Wednesday June 3rd, 2026
doncaster
Train to Leeds sometimes stops there, thankfully not for long.
Tuesday June 2nd, 2026
The List
The list has been around for a good number of years now — set up as the Mark Thomas Mailing List, he’s close to our heart but not the only thing The List is about. Comprising some 100 odd chatty left wing types, it’s a great place to meet people and discuss what’s going on. Also I don’t think there’s ever been a question asked of it that The List’s collective mind hasn’t been able to answer.
Subscribe mark-thomas
majordomo@gbnet dot net
Tuesday June 2nd, 2026
Radio 4
that station where joan collins had an argument live on air
Tuesday June 2nd, 2026
you make the rules
Roughly approximates to “I have something on you and if you don’t behave I’m gonna be a cunt”
Tuesday June 2nd, 2026
Ronald Hutton (Prof)
The leading authority on paganism and the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries. He’s great.....just look at his picture!
Monday June 1st, 2026
Dolphinstar
Two random, unconnected nouns brutally stapled together to form a wooly, gay name for a less-wooly and less gay man