Words of the Day for May 2026
People leave us lovely words in the amusingly named dick, along with short, factual and concise definitions. No really. Here's this month's words so far...
Friday May 8th, 2026
WASP
The word I scream to signify impending doom and destruction of the world as we know it
Friday May 8th, 2026
Dangerous Sports
Like foxhunting when your the fox.....only, I presume, not much fun
Friday May 8th, 2026
SPACED
One of the most inspired comedies of recent history. Best watched whilst under some sort of influence, but just as bizarre when sober.
Friday May 8th, 2026
Fox
Sam Fox. Touch me touch me, I wanna feel your body! Oh yeah!
Friday May 8th, 2026
Kylie
The word “Kylie” is Aboriginal and means “Boomerang”. Not a lot of people know that.
Friday May 8th, 2026
IRC
Internet Relay Chat. Invented in 1988, lets freaks (and other people) chat to each other over the interweb...
Friday May 8th, 2026
feltching
Also involves insertion of small, fluffy rodents into the rear. I got his info. from a book called "A to Z of bizarre sex by Tracey Love.
Friday May 8th, 2026
uncoffeed
To be without your morning coffee
Eg: Scott is uncoffeed this morning
Friday May 8th, 2026
Squits
Posh word for Diarrhoea (which is a stupid word anyway)
See also Bum Wee
Friday May 8th, 2026
Adam Baldwin
*drool*
One of the sexiest men to walk the Earth...
Friday May 8th, 2026
Jesus Army
evil people who try to run me over everytime they see me in the street!
Friday May 8th, 2026
stroke
Smooth slow motion of one’s hand along an object/person/sextoy
Friday May 8th, 2026
pub crawl
Noun. A bout of drinking held by touring numerous pubs (public houses). {Informal}
Friday May 8th, 2026
Q
A sometimes, pompous and snobby, music magazine, which I buy frequently.
Friday May 8th, 2026
marmite
Absolutely nothing like Vegemite – there is only one Marmite.
Friday May 8th, 2026
jeremy hunt
(Pl n).
Cockney rhyming slang. Often shortened to “Jeremy”
CF: "That taxi driver was a right Jeremy"
Thursday May 7th, 2026
CEX
Computer EXchange.
Dead groovy set of shops and website that sell second hand (and sometimes new) computer bits/dvds/games/anything that has batteries and isn’t a sex toy...
Deeply cool 
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Genius
Lickspittle in a red jumper who wouldn’t look nearly so smug if (s)he had ever watched Star Trek.
Often seen wandering around Apple stores. Rarely seen doing anything useful in their own habitats, something called a “Genius Bar”, where they stand around and natter amongst themselves whilst an irate queue forms to their left.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Olives
Small metal rings used in plumbing two pieces of copper pipe together....aha!
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Popstarz
Dodgy, badly spelt plural of the word Popstar.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Ramsey, Gordon
A man who needs his mouth washed out with soap. He also needs to leave his clothes on when he is on the TV. In fact, all of the time he needs to keep them on. I mean always. Eurgh, he’s dirty.
Oh, and he’s a chef.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
doncaster
You hate it, and you’ll know you have to leave.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Radio 4
The most beautiful thing about middle-class England is Radio 4. Destined, alas, to be replaced by “rolling” news. Don’t you love that word? News only rolls if you’re creating or publishing it. Those of us who digest it want our news pretty much stationary, thank you very much.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
masturbation
Sex with someone you love (paraphrased from Woody Allen)
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Big Brother
War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, Ignorance is Strength.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Elf
Orlando played one of these in the LOTR films. And he had lovely hair. And he could shoot arrows really well. But I don’t know what a real Elf would be like, so we’ll just take him as an example. Yes.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
cumbubbles
Bubbles of mangoo bubbling out of a bottom... usually experienced after a hard in and out bareback session when you have a gallon of spunk and 3 cubic metres of air up you..
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Wardrobe
Place to keep all the men you fancy, in preparation for you taking over the world with them.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Wooden Hill
Mythical portal leading – for some obscure reason – to Bedfordshire.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
chariots of fire
One of the worst films ever made. About men who ran and ran and ran for their country...even though everyone hated the Jewish guy coz he was Jewish...and everyone hated the Scottish guy because he was a staunch Christian.
I hate this film so much.
And it has the WORST theme tune ever.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
The Frames
As far as I am concerned – the greatest band currently on this little rock 
But for most just a fun accoustic Irish rock band with a penchent for nice strings...
Thursday May 7th, 2026
Midlands Today
Weekday BBC regional news programme responsible for launching the career of Nina Nannar and for keeping Nick Owen in work.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
wolverhampton
The City England forgot it had... or at least tried too... Capital of The Black Country.
Thursday May 7th, 2026
smokers
you’re fingers are all yellow, they’re the colour of poo, and when you get home, your walls are too! – a delightful song about smokers but I can’t recall where it’s from.
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
errorfied
One who is inclined to error; one who encourages and propagates error
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
barbican
Where long-legged plastic dolls go for a "number two"
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
Titan
Ref to “Cynds” to understand the strange person who is “aconite”.
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
lesbian bed death
This happens anywhere from a few weeks to a couple of years into a lesbian relationship. The sex stops and doesn’t restart and the two descend into bickering and pouting at each other due to sexual frustration. Apparently. 
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
Woo-woo
sirens on a Police car usualy refferred to in the pural in lines like “Serg, can we use our woo- woos on this shout?”
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
Billie Myers
One of Britain’s most under appreciated talents. A great singer/songwriter.
Responsible for the 1998 Top Ten hit single “Kiss The Rain”.
Wednesday May 6th, 2026
skinheads
Violent, racist, homophobic men with shaved heads who often wear agressive and intimidating clothing. Get their kicks beating the shit out of anyone they percieve as different and causing trouble at football events. Not to be confused with [2].
Tuesday May 5th, 2026
Bum wee
The type of diahorrea that you get after a heavy night’s drinking (or five). Like dishwater but less pleasant, it streams out from between your cheeks and makes weewee noises in the bowl
Tuesday May 5th, 2026
trains
The word Train comes from an ancient British word which means Delay. Resurrected by British Rail to keep people happy.
Tuesday May 5th, 2026
teabagging
Teabagging is an act carried out by a (An adult male person (as opposed to a woman)) man placing his (One of the two male reproductive glands that produce spermatozoa and secrete androgens) testicles on another (A human being) person or object, usually as a (A ludicrous or grotesque act done for fun and amusement) prank but sometimes for (Click link for more info and facts about sexual) sexual purposes. The act got its name from its supposed similarity to the action of dipping a (Click link for more info and facts about teabag) teabag. Some call the activity braining, after the appearance of the (The external pouch that contains the testes) scrotum.
. as in sex and the city
Tuesday May 5th, 2026
b0pping
the thing gay men can be found doing when incredibly drunk (or sober in my case)...
Monday May 4th, 2026
eevil
Like “evil” but more sinister. Often accompanied by steeple fingers
Monday May 4th, 2026
pink pound
Noun. Disposable income that ‘gays’ ostensibly have through not having the financial expense of children.
Monday May 4th, 2026
Podcast
Another way to hear some one bitch about the world
Sunday May 3rd, 2026
Dermot O’Leary
Hunky sexy TV Presenter, best known for being on Big Brother, Big Breakfast and the odd Comic Relief show...
I want...
www.dermotoleary.net/pictures/other8/img_dermbelt.jpg
Uh uh.... 
www.dermotoleary.net/pictures/t4/img_derm04n.jpg
YOU LUCKY BITCH!...
i116.photobucket.com/albums/o37/dermotolearynet/comicrelief_01/comicrelief_03.jpg
Sunday May 3rd, 2026
Jesus Army
Evil Northampton-based weirdos who rampage through town in eerily psychadelic minibuses spreading crosses and indoctrination.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
angelou
Gorgeous band from Norwich – Now going by the name “Holly Lerski and Angelou”
Used to listen to them live years ago, and now they’re almost famous.
Humble is one of the most gorgeousest songs ever
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
alarm clock
1. alarm clock
An act of fellatio which wakes the person receiving. Usually results in immediate nutting due to surprise and overall awesomeness.
“Why’s your girlfriend got a black eye?”
"I was tired, so I hit the snooze button"
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
man utd
Team for has-been glory-seekers.
NB largest fan-base registered in Swindon
Try below for a better option
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
choke the chicken
Vrb Phrs. To masturbate. E.g."It’s no wonder you’re tired, spending every waking hour choking the chicken!"
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Forbidden Planet
A place where slightly spotty yet attractively geeky young men hang out. It also sells comics and rekated items.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Diarhhoea
result of eating dodgey food in the developing world
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
cheesetoastie
CheeseToastie: noun;
Something that David added to the dictionary because it wouldn’t let him link to “Cheese Toastie” with a space.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
no2id
The last lot of ID cards were burnt with great aplomb in the early 1950s, why do we want the bloody things now?
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Tea
The giver of life. Solves all problems in the world ever.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Blean
Scientific measure of luminosity : 1 glimmer = 100,000 bleans. Usherettes’ torches are designed to produce between 2.5 and 4 bleans, enabling them to assist you in falling downstairs, treading on people or putting your hand into a Neapolitan tub when reaching for change.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Metro
A newspaper produced free by the makers of the daily_mail and other horrendous rags like that...
Tries really hard to pretend that it’s not a right wing scaremongering piece of trash but occasionally forgets and prints a ranty and rather special article or two.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Copulate
The time it takes a policeman to turn up in an emergency
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
David Blunkett
Seems to get a lot more action than he deserves.
Saturday May 2nd, 2026
Miller Genuine Draft
Real MGD is a light tasting lager, brewed in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
In the UK it doesn’t taste as good, but it does have a higher alcohol content, so it’s not all bad!