Scott’s blog
Musings on a world I am no longer sure about
Sometimes it’s good. Sometimes it’s bad.
Sometimes I feel like I want to curl up and die. Sometimes I feel so alive. I am all over the place at the moment. But finding it hard. I haven’t seen him in over three weeks, haven’t spoken to him in a week and I just can’t stop caring. I don’t know what to do. Some days are sneaky, it creeps up on me from behind then engulfs me so hard I feel my heart will explode. Some days I just miss talking about things. And the really fucking stupid thing? We’ve now almost been apart as long as we were going out. I used to think I didn’t believe in love at first sight but now I’m not so sure... I just miss him. So I have to move on...
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Another day, why do I bother...
Out last night. Went to Retro to insert a graphics card into Owen (his PC is nearly as ill as Novak ) and bumped into James so got a hug and a chat until Owen arrived. I had a strong feeling about something so was on edge all night. A feeling that something bad happened last night, I think I know who concerning and I am worried... Still...a few beers and I blocked it out. Must phone mum tonight... Warren and Lloyd turned up to Retro, and then Justin too. I demanded everyone fuck off to Barcode (again, a strong feeling I needed to be there) for the £1 a drink night. So bumped into Griffypoos and Neilio (bizarre thing whereby someone mentions freakcity and he says “Oh, I joined that ages ago” and then Lloyd points him at me and says "Oh, it’s his"). Griff refused to submit to peer pressure and sign up. He doesn’t know what he’s missing Had some beers, then left at 9:30 or so and went to CXR with Lloyd for another one of my drunken conversations with him. Well, sorta. There’s things on my mind and I needed a friend and he was there and I wasn’t that drunken. Introduced him to the wonders of Dionysus lamb (MMMM) and chicken doner. The lamb is always gorgeous, it just falls off the bone and melts in the mouth. I can’t exactly explain quite how wonderful it is. It’s like drunkFood™ but actually nice... Home. Server crash. Sleep. Woke up. Server crash. Bah. Tubed in coz I was fixing Novak for too long. Tho it’s stayed up since then. Am strongly starting to suspect that as the one thing I’ve not started is smb that perhaps something dodgy is going on with it. Either that or TJs new iMac is EVIL and MUST BE STOPPED. Work today is fun. Plus I added more images to beta.freakcity.net to make it prettier. Collecting pills so I can do something funky instead of the sweeties. Emo!