On a bus trying to make grafitti work after too much beer. So there may be typos. Not sure what to say other than I’m scared and hate the whole of life right now. I’m drowning in debt and don’t know what to do to make it right - I try but the immensity of my debt scares me right now. I am out of luck. I have always managed somehow to escape my problems but I think I’m about to hit rock bottom. I go out and feel fine and pretend it’s all ok but it’s not. I end up being sad and alone wherever I am and I don’t know what to do for the first time in my life. I want to help a friend but I can’t - I want to help myself but I can’t do that either, I feel my hands are tied. I need to be grounded but I don’t know how any more. I am burying things both financially and spiritually and I need to feel free again. I am fucked and I have no idea how to be unfucked. And no wish to ask for help fixing my own mistakes : ( Somehow I need a spare £700 next month. I’ve done all I can to gain as much spare as I can but it still won’t be enough. Sometimes I really hate life : (