TheElusivePossom’s blog
The Secret Diary of Gaydrian Pole, Aged 19 and a bit!
Planet of the Gapes 2: Journey to the Centre of My Ass
Hmmm, I realise now that I tend to have an extended weekend of nihilstic fun, and then write about it 5 days later when I’ve forgotten it all! As such, only the juiciest details will be included here...
- FRIDAY -
I went to The Swan with Scottlet, and we met up with Mogwai, Mage and Wozzle and I had a Black (blackcurrant) Magners’ (Magners’) of Death on the Mountains of Dark Mordor (with ice). I loved being a couple with Scottbet there, although he seemed to think ppl were staring and wondering what we were doing together. I put his mind at ease by massaging his balls. He likes that.
I got my coat back, made a pass at the bouncer, and took Scott home because he was a tired moose.
- SATURDAY -
Scott and I got up really late /again/...we’re really bad at that! We did a really quick xmas shop, but I didn’t have time to get much. I made everyone really late for the ice-skating thing (sorry guys!) and it was clearly the coldest day ever - I kept hugging Scott for warmth much to his extreme annoyance!
I sat and watched the wonderful skating skills of Lloyd, Warren and Mogwai (who had clearly done it before, the gay) - Warren’s movement was poetry in motion! I played with Scott’s device and he took a few groovy pics of chairs and ppl’s shoes. We then grabbed some food from the cafe round the corner and discussed Voltaire.
Then we all headed home (uh-oh, i’ve started to call it home! 
) and began the festivities proper! - Scott mulled wine and I mulled over Scott. We had delicious chicken bits, and after watching lots of lovely TV (and having some deep mind-warping discussions) we all went to bed had some sexy sex.
- SUNDAY -
Was a bit more organised this time - Scott took me to the lovely market at Spitalfields (where he was attacked by Jack the Ripper once) and I managed to buy a few things. It was very sweet of him to tag along, as it was clearly hurting him to be conscious, let alone trudge around with me in the cold! We had a lovely meal at Pizza Express, which was hell for poor Scottling 
I really hope he gets better during the week!
- MONDAY -
Work today was laughably lethargic - I basically just chatted to Scott and wanked to spreadsheets. After, it got interesting tho - I went to my School reunion. We were divided into tables: jocks and popular kids on one, the GX crew on another, and the Emo kids and complete losers on the last. Guess where I was the evening basically consisted of teachers sucking the cocks of students on the first table and showering them with awards. I was delighted to hear, however, that Oli (one of bestest friends ever) won Musician of the Year and Alex (the love of my life) won the award for best human in the world. I had 7 glasses of wine, but Jon Badowski had 12, as well as a large does of Night Nurse, and he collapsed against a tree, threw up and had to be taken home.
After that, we moved on to a party at Amy’s house, which turned out to be amazing! We played pictionary, and I drank a lot, and I got to see all my uni friends again, including Tom (FIT!) and Peter (other previous love) who now has regular sex from his fat new gf Sarah! Yey! Speaking of Sarah (the bitch that sent me threatening e-mails) she DID turn up, but left after about 5 mins, so I didn’t even have to see her - Glad I’ve made things uncomfortable for her.
CHRIS: “I find the whole concept of religion ridiculous”
DRUNKEN SIMON: “I know...’s’like...you’re not supposed to find black ppl ridiculous...but they are...”
CHRIS: ...
Amy and I laughed at him for about 10 mins. 
T’other Simon was drunk AGAIN, and kept asking ppl to have sex with him (he asks me a little too much, I feel). Peter told me things with his gf were “going well”, so I made sure he knew how much I “keep making Scott cum”. We played the After Eight game (where you place it on your forehead and try getting it in your mouth, without using hands) and I eventually got there! I also got to meet Dan’s new love interest, who<
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Beer Bad
- YESTERDAY -
After braving work once again, I got home and collapsed. Mark rang to invite me round for a DVD evening, but I was too tired to understand him and hung up. Then Amy called to invite me out to the pub with Dave and Mansell, who is back from uni! She asked me also to invite Mark. When our conversation ended, I fell asleep. Then dinner was ready....mmm chicken tikka masala with keema-naan!
Dave didn’t turn up at the pub in the end, but John Brittain did, and he’s hilarious - he should clealy be doing stand-up! I told Mansell about Scott, and he’s dying to meet him. Pool was hilarious, as we were all pretty plastered apart from Amy, and the rules went out the window about half-way through.
I got home and tactifully suggested to Scott that I would be online by sending him a kiss via a helpful Warren! He was quite tipsy too, and may have said a few things that he now regrets! They were very nice things though...
I had to go to bed after a while because I started to feel extremely woozy.
Woke up with a headache and a sore throat (still!). I also had to go for “Rich Roast” from the coffee machine, a step down from its Italian ancestor. Doesn’t matter that, as I’m probably seeing Scott tonight!!!
Might try and get my uni entry sorted over lunch...
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Close your eyes and dream...
- MONDAY -
Hmm, a lot can’t have happened because I can’t remember Monday very well...I woke up with a sore throat, so Mummy sent me straight back to bed with some soup and booked a Doctor’s appointment. I told the Dr all I could about my condition, deciding to omit the detail that I gave my first blowjob the weekend before (You lose your ticket for the THIRD time at a train station and it’s time for desperate measures!). He prescribed a little course of Strepsils, and my dad picked me up a pack of “Orange Vit C” flavour. I already take Vit C supplements daily, so I hope I am not in danger of overdosing on the vitamin C and catching whatever the opposite to scurvy is.
- TUESDAY -
I left for London a lot later than intended in order to meet Scott...upon arriving at Canary Wharf (a beautifully yet unhelpfully large station) I rang him, only for my phone to die mid-ring! Typical! You leave a mobile phone switched on for ages and it runs out of battery! I resorted to the classic method of scouring the entire station, finding him in the last place I looked, looking radiant in a pool of yellow light like an angel, if angels were sexy.
We walked along the river bank drinking in the sites of glowing skyscrapers and shimmering moonlight...Gah! This journal has turned into a poetic epic! We then took the DLR across the water in order to head to a non-descript pub for bummers. However, we realised on arrival that it was shut. Scott looked cold, so I wrapped my scarf around him - it suited him better anyway, and he looked very cute! Scott then took me to a REALLY nice bar place, where we got pints and stared out at the view of speedy boats with the city as a backdrop. It was driving me nuts not being able to kiss him, but I’ll make up for that this weekend hopefully!
Next port of call was to meet Amy and friends for Ice-skating madness! We got there a little late, but that gave me time to get a giant choc chip cookie and a Baileys with Hot Chocolate and whipped cream, which I’m sorry, is heaven in a cup! The witty phrase “better get our skates on” was used on 4 seperate occasions 
Then came the actual ice-skating...once Amy had finished putting on my boots and wristguards we were ready to go! I had been prepared to do it at my usual pace (spend the entire hour clinging to the barrier for dear life) but Amy saw otherwise, grabbed me by the hand, and dragged me round shouting “Bend your knees! Lean forward! You’re not skating, you’re stepping, that’s...LEAN FORWARD!!” Oh I love her! I only fell over once, which I was ecstatic about. One unlucky girl however fell badly, and they had to skate a stretcher out to her as Amy and I subtly skated around the scene. The day was slightly hampered later when a coffin-on-skates entered the rink on our way out (!)
We had dinner at this really dodgy pizza place, and played word games! Then we listened to A-Ha and JT on the way home in the car! What a day!
- WEDNESDAY -
Woke up around 1pm, had a quick brekkie and headed over to Dan’s carting my huge instrument. He had set up to record “Rain Dancer (The Calm)”, our Madonna-esque techno-pop triumph, when I suddenly realised I had no words written for it...so that stopped abruptly. However, we did manage to record “Dream” in its entirety (minus piano) despite my sore throat, so I was very happy about that. I told Dan of my recent sexual conquests. He gave a thumbs up and asked if I wanted more delay on the vocal track. Can anything phase that man?
Now I’m back in the office, having spent 1.5 hours on lunch break. I’m seeing Scott on Friday and I can’t wait! He’s the fresh gravy to my Brussel sprout.
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At home with the freaks!
- FRIDAY -
I went to see the new Chronicles of Narnia with a few girly girls and a bloke called John. We had time before the film, however, so we decided to go have a meal at Nando’s in Harrow, a really nice Portugese place. John and I order bottles of illegal dodgy-looking cider, and gayly, the gang recounted hilarious drunken stories! Amy advised against ordering any meal doused in sauce of the “HOT” variety. I, of course, ignored this completely and ordered a double chicken burger in the stuff...and my face was melted off! I was sat with my mouth open unable to speak for a fair while, and that wasn’t even the most powerful hotness. Owch!
The film itself disappointed a few - I thought it was alrite. I noticed a continuity error involving ripping a wanted notice off the wall, which I’m dead chuffed about! I’ll probably do a Metacritic review of it at some point, as I haven’t in ages.
- SATURDAY -
Crawled out of bed a little later than intended, so got to Embankment almost an hour after I arranged to meet Scott! Ooops. I saw him for the first time leaning sexily against a pillar at the station while I looked a total fanny trying to get out my ticket for the barrier. I went over and said Hi and heard his voice for the first time, ’twas beautiful! We walked along the South Bank together to see a few sites and to head towards a uni I might attend; my throat had never been dryer, and I came out with so much bollocks! We got hoplessly lost, but Scott got his little device out, and as he fiddled with it, I sneakily got closer to him from behind, feigning interest in our location. The closeness felt goood! We eventually found the uni (tho I was more interested in the proximity of gay bars) but just being with Scott felt very nice. 
We went for something to eat in a little cafe that Scott recommended, and both went for the “Tradizionale” all-day breakfast thing...by that point I had realised that Scott was as lovely as I thought he was online, and I was feeling very comfortable with him, despite the fact looking at him was making me all squishy!
We went back to Scott’s (he lives in a nice-ish area, surrounded by green bits complete with scary tree of death-by-hanging) and I got to meet the positively delightful Warren and the bundle-of-high-pitched-joy that is TJ, and both were very lovely and welcoming! Scott showed me the amazing view from his balcony, and we marked our new status as boyfriends by having our first kiss...it was something special. I think I’ve been a very lucky possum.
After having a few Carlsbergs and chillin’ at Scott’s to some Smiths, we took the bus to Retro, a bar I had tried out a week before with Dave. There I met more of the lovable collective that is FreakCity, including Danny/Mage (EXACTLY like my friend Jack Allport, which has made we question Jack’s straightness 
, Dave/Footle (looks a bit like Harry Potter, but sexier and more delightful to chat to) and Justin, Alex, Tom and Jon with Rob serving us drinks. Argh, so many names, and I have a terrible memory! Had the most amazing drink - a Magners and black...mmmm! I later requested a Smirnoff Ice, and after several blank looks Danny replied “...so a vodka and coke then”. Tee hee! I liked hanging with the guys a lot - Hope I can make it to the Xmas bash!
Upon leaving Retro, Warren and I burst into song and recited the Best Of the Buffy musical! When we got back to Scott’s, we cuddled up and watched the real thing - talk about being in Heaven! I knew then I would find it very difficult to part with him in the morning; he’s become kinda special to me.
- SUNDAY -
The last day spent with Scott! Argh! We arranged to get up bright and early to meet Amy, but decided a long lie-in was instead necessary. I heard about a huge explosion of an oil depot that woke my parents up, and Mogs got a live feed of it into his room - scary stuff! Scott cooked the most amazing steak lunch, his chips are something else! We cuddled up
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UCAS, Printers, Builders and Salmon
I got home last night very tired and exhausted from all the sex I had that day (where “sex” is a clear euphemism for filing). I then discovered I had gotten an e-mail from London South Bank uni, confirming an unconditional offer! This is great news...except that it may be located in a bad area of London (Elephant and Castle/Old Kent Road anyone?), and it may not be academically good. Still, I will check it out on Saturday....with SCOTT! Tomorrow’s the big day, and my excrament is getting so far from solid, I could bottle it and call it a mudshake.
Seeing as UCAS are in fact complete ’tards, I may have to write my entire application again, including my personal statement, which took me about 3 months time, though this time around I’ll have about a weekend...I’m beginning to get all stressed about it Decided to get an early night, then decided to watch Six Feet Under instead while downing fruit smoothie.
As a result, I woke up shattered, so took 2 Pro-Plus and chose the most hardcore blend of coffee from the machine...Italian Blend :O The taste suffers from its extreme potency, but I don’t care because I live on the edge.
The printer jammed itself again, but being a complete ’tard it kept reattempting the job, so I heard the same monotonous clunks over and over again. Also (as I write, journal) there are 4 oafish builder lads who are annoyingly (and not in a cute way) drilling in desks and discussing “birds” they’ve “shagged”. I’m sure the entire office would be happier if Dave and Phil kept their sordid sex lives within an inaudible field.
I’ll stop ranting now, because I sound like Adrian Mole. I take comfort in my Salmon baps, delicious as always. I hope Scott comes close to tasting as divine as my mum’s salmon baps. This time tomorrow I’ll know...
Having a meal and seeing Narnia tonight, will give me review afterwards.
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First Past the Post
Being bored at work during lunchtime (as I am right now), I thought I would follow Scott’s advice to fill my slot...by starting a journal. I tried keeping a diary before (it had Wallace and Gromit pictures in), but abandoned this after the “9 year old girl” phase had passed.
Day 1!
It’s just another work day as usual today - started off by making a small tower out of Pro-Plus tablets. “Small” is a definite factor, having only two tablets left to work with, but I was deeply satisfied with the results.
I spend most of my time in the Archive, which I am certain must have been shortened from “Arctic Cave”, because it’s ball-numbingly cold in there. Fortunately, putting a wall full of pages in the right order is hot and sexy, so it almost balances out. Anyway, I have my iPod, so I can bop to ABBA while I file!
Been listening to InMe’s latest offering “White Butterfly” - it’s truly superb and supremely cathartic. I will purchase their debut on Saturday, which is when I meet Freakcity Overlord Scott for the first time. To be honest, Journal, I’m getting a little nervous about the whole thing, but he promises to be gentle with me, so It’s definitely a day to look forward to! He makes me moist.
Well I better return to the igloo - those pages won’t order themselves...unfortunately.